With each day that passes I feel the darkness within my soul grow stronger. I isolate myself from others so I won't have to deal with there eventual betrayal. I'm not sure why I think people will do that to me, all I know is that it has happened before and it shall happen again. Trust is a very hard thing for me to have in people, and I can safely say there are very few who I do trust, and I trust them little. Perhaps I am just to negative and this is all in my head. Maybe I am not as sane as I think, and all I feel is just part of my malformed mind. Malformed being the proper word for my mind, because it is a cespool of grusome thoughts and disturbing imagry. But what can I say, it's all I have got and it's not going to change any time soon. Depression grips me many times, and it can be difficult at those times for me to see good in any thing. Talking to people when I am that way is no help either, because they either tell me to stop my whineing or that I depress them and they stop talking to me. To them I say, if you don't want to hear what I am feeling then don't ask me if I am alright in the first place. Yes I have thought of doing my self harm on many occasions, however when I am about to put those thoughts into action, some thing inside keeps me from doing it. However I feel that one day what ever it is inside that keeps me from harming my self will go away, and there will be nothing to protect me from my self. Now to those of you who are reading this, and think I may not be all there in the head. Think what you want to think, because it means little to me. I also want you also to remember that we are all dying, it's just a matter of time and circumstance that brings about our final day.